Affectionate Diary

Clocked, all three endings seen. Not 100% souls but I’m not that desperate for something to play on the tube. I might move on to Julius mode next, if I haven’t bought Portrait of Ruin by Saturday, which I’m still in two minds about.

My first ever Castlevania experience has been one of the most frustrating, beautiful, rewarding, tedious and satisfying experiences I’ve had the pleasure/torture of experiencing. Let’s talk about what’s FUCKING SHIT first, shall we?

Collecting souls for new abilities. Most of the souls are shit, some of them are amazing. As a way of changing the way Soma moves around and fights I think collecting abilities from defeated enemies is a brilliant idea. What I didn’t like was the fiddly way it’s implemented in the later stages of the game, which force you to pause the game to reassign abilities mid-fight. If I can dash forwards now, let me keep that as standard. If I can fly, let me keep that as standard. Also, if a soul is required to progress any further, don’t make me grind bad guys for 20 minutes to get it. I will tolerate that in an MMO, where it’s expected and I’m prepared for it, and actually enjoy it, but in a platformer it bores me. It also flies in the face of platformer logic, and it wasn’t until I’d read it in an FAQ (a regular necessity) that I allowed myself believe that’s what I needed to do. Before that, I’d suspected it, but presumed that the game designer didn’t hate me. How could he? He’d already given me such a beautiful playground as proof of his love.

So the soul thing is quite specifically not-perfect. It’s a brilliant idea that nearly gets it, but fucks up REALLY badly just enough times to be FUCKING SHIT. Not specifically wrong also is the total lack of explaination of any of the information on show. Perhaps that stuff is basic common knowledge to regular Castlevania fans, but I really had no idea what 75 per cent of the stats meant, beyond how much damage I was doing. I get that CON is gonna increase my HP, but each monster has a page of stats for it that probably make them quite easy to deal with if you know how. I clearly didn’t.

The lack of information given to deal with the game is not really a fault as such - ten years ago I’d have had enough mental energy and motivation to have worked out most of it on my own. And let’s face it - this game was designed ten years ago. Today I need other people to do it for me, because, well, I guess I’ve got lazy. I just want to have fun. And I did! Thanks to gameFAQs. And that’s probably ok, because everyone has gameFAQs, so I’ll shut the fuck up about being rubbish.

BUT! And I need that but in caps with an exclam because I’ve just shat in Castlevania’s mouth when it doesn’t really deserve it - Castlevania: Dawn of Sorrow is brilliant. It’s more beautiful than any 2D game I’ve seen in living memory, it’s imaginative, well laid out, the enemies are brilliant (aesthetically and strategically) and there is scope for that thing I love the most - expression within my own personal playing style. In that, Castlevania triumphs. Also, it is nothing like how I imagined it would be, and is easily my best gaming find in years. I should never have avoided it for so long.

So I’m in two minds about buying the next game in the series on Saturday. I definitely want it - they’ve ditched the soul-farming system - it’s just a matter of if I should play something else first. But Pokemon is so very, very close, and it already took me a month to finish this Castlevania.

It’s at the regional stage in Tokyo at the moment. They didn’t invite me to take part - I expect they’d be embarassed by a foreigner winning.

Fudou (Lion) won the first one.

This website is boring, now that all I do is talk about VF.

I’M ONLY JUST GETTING STARTED, BUSTER.

All I can do is think about VF5. The new offensive manouvre - even VFDC hasn’t got to grips with it yet. I’ve thought about that for at least 20 minutes in my lunch break.

The tutorial mode disappearing - is that because Sega has done deals with guide book publishers? I bet it is. In my mind, though, it works out quite well because it forces me to experiment of my own accord, and choose one combo over another because it looks better, not because it does four points of damage more. And that’s important because I think Virtua Fighter is about expression more now than ever. In VF4 you could always tell when Minami Akira was playing, or Hood Lion, or Chibita (OBVIOUSLY) just from their playing style. I think that’s going to be true of VF5 but x1000 (like EA’s next gen physics), since there’s now so many ways to express yourself with your playing style.

Last night I found myself shouting “sick!” at an empty room every time I bussed out G cancels after P,P,d+P. I know it’s wrong, but it feels so right.

Lion has a slight hunch when he’s in ready stance now, which makes him look slightly less camp, which means I don’t like it. Putting him in a zebra-skin hat goes some way to remedying the problem but it’s hardly ideal. I’ve not yet seen any name ranked Lions but the 9th and 10th dan AIs are pretty fucking sexy. In particular his tanned skin and bare chest items look brilliant and more gay than I could ever hope for. I’ve yet to see him adorned by any toys yet, though. I hope they kept in the keyboard guitar and Kiss face paint from Final Tuned. I’ll find out when I get to a higher rank, which will be really soon because the AI is COMPLETE TOSS.

So far my tactics have been simple - get away from the close game to just outside middle distance and then do Lion’s b,d+T move. You could probably substitute that for any low move, really. So far, the AI has been happy to wait just long enough for me to start to execute a move after I back dash and then dash in towards me, giving me an easy crumple combo. It falls for it over and over and over; I hope that changes when it gets to a higher level. Also, it techrolls about one in ten times, meaning you basically get a free pounce. I don’t really mind, though - I’m only playing single player to dress up my character. The real fighting will happen when people come round.

Lion is more rushdown than before, as are they all, really, but he’s nothing compared to El Blaze’s and Eileen’s movesets, which make me think of Angel from King of Fighters (in that it’s all about customisable combos and relentless attacking, not that they’re spastic hard to control).

Lau.VF has the best costume so far, I think.

Pros -

All white chinese suit Akira with red hair.
The Japanese commentary.
Jacky with dungarees, straps tied round his waist, no shirt.
“It’s like you’re moving in slow motion.”
“Look at my physique!”
“Forgot to train, ‘ey?”

Cons -

The American commentary.
No tutorial mode.
Having to turn it off because it’s time to go to bed.

I also got Okami and Lost Planet, but I seriously doubt I’ll ever play them now. I go to pick up my sticks in an hour. So far -

Lion makes annoying noises, but he’s twice the man he used to be.

Jeffry is HUGE.

Akira is faster, scarily so, but then they all are, kind of, since they all have G-cancels.

Jacky is a pimp, blatant. I wish I was Jacky.

Sarah - ho.

Vanessa - lesbian, this time not afraid to show it.

Overall - AMAZING

More when I get my sticks.

Or, how Zelda could be if Nintendo were to grow the fuck up.

10/10

Today’s the day!

The sticks are in the London depot! I’ll have code by Monday!

OH MY GOD IT’S NEARLY HERE!